growing pains

I had a voicemail from my Grandma last night asking if I was okay or if i was sick. why? because I hadn’t blogged all week. yikes… called out by my Grandma! well, at least i know someone checks the blog on a regular basis :)

the reality is, there’s been a lot going on in my world over the past two weeks and it has required lots of time to process. Everyone processes a little differently, some people just blurt everything out, deal with it right away, and move on. I’ve never been like that. I have to think before I speak. There are moments in conversations where I will literally sit there with my hand over my mouth to keep from speaking prematurely before I’ve fully developed my thoughts. Sometimes thats a good thing, and other times? not so much. So thats part of the reason for the silence on the blog this past week. Its been full of processing. and what I’ve realized about it all? The Lord is growing me right now. in some BIG, real, practical, hard, necessary ways.

and let me tell you, there are growing pains that come along with it.

He is asking me to trust Him with some new areas of my life, and calling me into new very unfamiliar spaces. He’s asking me for obedience now, with no promise of an explanation of the “why” behind it. and that, dear friends, is so much easier said than done!

The name of the game in this particular season of life is ‘waiting’. Wait and see. There are so, SO many people in my life just waiting it seems. Waiting for changes. Waiting for healing. Waiting for relationships. Waiting for jobs. Waiting for a positive pregnancy test. Waiting for hard conversations. Waiting for reconciliation. Waiting for certainty. Waiting for things that they see other people don’t necessarily have to wait for. so why them?

but i’ve learned that there is ALWAYS something there IN the waiting… if you are open to it. 

This waiting game comes with a whole mess of emotions. Discouragement, confusion, and frustration being a few that pop up in my spirit more often than I’d like to admit. but here’s the thing, God has PURPOSE in the waiting. There are lessons to endure, and that endurance that leads to character, and character that leads to HOPE. (Romans 5:3-4). and Hope is always worth it. I’ve come to realize this week that this passage from Colossians describes so well the end goal, or the “why” if you will, of all these growing pains:

“We continually ask God to fill you with the knowledge of His will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives, so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way; bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and giving joyful thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of his holy people in the kingdom of light.” – Colossians 1:9-12

Oh friends, that right there is what i WANT my life to look like. a life that bears fruit in EVERY area from my relationships, to my business, to my ministry. a life that is continually growing in knowledge and understanding of God and his will for my life. and the strength to have great endurance, patience, and a joyful heart in ALL things. Thats what its all about. A life that is modeled after Christ’s.

its a process though, and that process is SO worth those growing pains. and all of the waiting that has been done and is still to come. The reality is that God’s word says that He is GOOD to those who wait (Lamentations 3:35), and that He is worthy of all praise and my TRUST. Thank you, Lord!

What are you waiting on? I would challenge you to look for the lessons you’re learning in the mean time, and to constantly remind yourself, or let Bethany Dillon remind you, that the Lord is GOOD to those who wait:

I am waiting on You
I am waiting on You
You say You’re good to those who wait
My heart’s discouraged
So I come to you expectant.
You say You’re good to those who wait

Lord, today You know what I need to do,
But You can do more in my waiting than in my doing I could do
So I won’t run anymore
I’m waiting on You.

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  1. Elizabeth says:

    I had noticed you did not blog for awhile, I hope is all and you will update your blogs more often. Remember do take things one day at a time. Cheers!

  2. Grandma says:

    Go Granny! We pray, and pray, and pray. God hears you, Jessie, because your faith is so strong. I love you. xoxoxo

  3. mel avjean says:

    Ah! The waiting. I will try to make this story short but it can only be condensed to 12 years. Jess, after my marriage to Michael ended, (gracefully put, cause that is another 12 year story)I prayed for GOD to make me in to the person HE wanted me to be. MY desire was that when GOD sent me someone to spend my life with, as I was SURE he would do, that I be ready. That I not screw up the gift.
    My waiting, growing, learning, living in faith, whatever name you give it, was 12 years. It was a time of discovery and fear. It was a great blessing. I thought it was the greatest thing that ever happened to me because it allowed me to become someone I am proud to be, really the greatest gift has become what I waited for. My husband. My equally yoked, equally imperfect, equally faithful, husband. Lord knows, it took me some time to get ready for this man! He helps me live my faith, daily.
    I am so proud that you live in faith. I am so in awe that you are light years ahead of me and most of the rest of the world on your journey. The joy of watching your life unfold is a gift to me. I don’t know what GOD has in store for your life but I do know that you will ROCK it! Ministry? Babies? Service? Success? All of the above? Yep. Crush it:) You are an amazing Child of GOD.
    With all my love, mel

  4. Mike Kelly says:

    Thanks for this post Jessie! I’ve been blog-stalking you for awhile and I’m currently in a waiting season. This was a great reminder for having patience and letting God work it all out both in the situation and me, so thanks!

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